Good Morning Gorgeous!

I opened my last post with a statement about self-reflection. This was tough for me, because for a long time, I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror for 60 seconds without crying.

I didn’t like the reflection staring back at me; didn’t like who I was, didn’t like what I was putting up with in my relationship, didn’t feel like I was where I was supposed to be in life, wasn’t successful enough, wasn’t pretty enough, wasn’t thin enough...just wasn’t enough! I had to figure out the source of my dislike of self. Reconciliation did not come easy; it came with work, prayer, meditation, therapy, and the hard lesson of self-reflection.

As I worked out this morning, I decided to use the time to “have a little talk with Jesus”. I put on my gospel mix and jumped on the elliptical machine for my 30-minute cardio workout. Imagine Me by Kirk Franklin came on and for the first time in a long time, I dissected the lyrics. That first verse hit the nail on the head, and I couldn’t help by cry as I listened.

Imagine me loving what I see

When the mirror looks at me

'Cause I, I imagine me

In a place of no insecurities

And I'm finally happy

'Cause I imagine me

Letting go of all of the ones who hurt me

'Cause they never did deserve me

Can You imagine me?

Saying no to thoughts that try to control me

Remembering all You told me

Lord, can You imagine me?

-Kirk Franklin

One day during my prayer and meditation time (you’ll hear me talk a lot about that...it works people!), I just decided that I would no longer entertain the Devil and remain in the self-pity mode that I had become accustomed to. “I AM MORE THAN ENOUGH”, I said to myself. “My Maker makes no mistakes!”

In working with my therapist, she gave me a challenge called “30 Days of Me”. Each day, for 30 days, I would write down one thing about myself that was awesome.

It was exactly what I needed to reconfirm my bad-assness and the power of me. Not only did writing things about myself that I love reveal my greatest assets, but my health journey continues to allow me to have the energy I need to refocus and pivot. I’m feeling great y’all!! I’m redecorating my house (more on that to come!) and putting into myself all that I had put into a failing relationship.

Below is a list of things that I have put into action.

• Working out (it creates endorphins)...to be fit and healthy, not skinny - In the voice of Elle Woods (Reese Witherspoon’s character in Legally Blonde “Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t commit murder.” LOL!!

• Reflecting on my accomplishments

• Affirming my value with the 30 days of Me challenge

• Surrounding myself with positive people

• Lessening the need to be perfect

• Living in the moment

• No longer comparing my journey to that of others

• Learning to wear what the hell I want (put on the damn crop top and strut!)

• Using my free time to do things that I love

“I’ve come to believe that all my past failure and frustration were actually laying the foundation for the understandings that have created the new level of living I now enjoy.” - Tony Robbins

These days, I'm loving who I see staring back at me. Now when I get that first look at my reflection, I say “Good morning gorgeous!”, take a couple of deep breaths, pose (the category is Greatness!), and start the day with vision, purpose, and confidence.

Until next time…thanks for listening!